HowMyBootyEndUpInTheAir?: IV Play

Many people don’t know that I’m a huge fan of The Dream on the low. Recently, his latest album, IV Play, was released. It’s cute but not his best body of work. That’s besides the point. Although the single, IV Play, isn’t a huge hit or anything like that (thank gawd) I feel like I need to address the statement he is trying to make in this song because it sounds really cute to the naked ear, but you can’t put too much past me lyrically.

If you’ve followed my blog for a while then you know I’m all about the prerequisite which is a part of foreplay. If not, you can read about it here.

The Dream aka Terius Nash is trying to be cute in the way he sings about cutting out foreplay with his woman, but nigga you are not slick!!! For those who aren’t sure what foreplay is its all the things that come before actually having sexual intercourse ranging from caressing, kissing, nibbling, sucking, licking, and of course the prerequisite. Dictionary.com defines foreplay as sexual stimulation of one’s partner, usually as a prelude to sexual intercourse.

The key word in that definition is stimulation. If we’re skipping foreplay how am I suppose to be stimulated and ready to give you the good good?! Is the mere sight of you suppose to make me wet?! Well, okay… never mind that last statement, but you get what I’m trying to say. I would like a little more incentive to stay nice and wet; it makes the moments of pleasure that much more explosive.

I know every time you’re about to have sex there isn’t going to be foreplay involved,  but The Dream’s justification for skipping foreplay is ridiculous.

I can give a fuck about the foreplay, I want it now, I’m talkin’ straight sex, stop fuckin’ around

Impatience on your part is not reason enough to just skip foreplay! Then at the end of the song he’s talking about going all night.

Tell me you gon’ set it off all night

Sir, you want me to sex you all night with no foreplay?! It’s not impossible, but it comes off a little selfish. Straight sex is like for a quickie not tryna pull an all nighter or a ’round for ’round session. Granted foreplay-esq moves can be incorporated during actual intercourse which saves this song from being a complete blunder. You tried it, Terius!

Adding insult to injury he also says:

Early morning, I’m so horny,, I just had it, still I want it, ride up on it whenever you come around

Don’t get me wrong I got that snapback and all but can I get a break?! Can that break be foreplay, please? Wanting stunts and shows:

Now work that shit, do that shit, make a nigga crazy

Which isn’t necessarily a problem because I want to give my best efforts at all times, but if were gonna skip foreplay and keep stunts and shows then I’m definitely gonna need a “throw it in the bag” excursion to make up for it. I’m gonna need to my trips to Monaco and all that shit. After all that work I’ve earned it to the second root! (Yeah, I’m good at algebra too lol)

I already let The Dream slide about sweating out my hair then he comes up with this shit?! Tried It!!

The fact that he really tries to make the song sound somewhat romantic has me giving him the ultimate side eye.

I don’t want to waste your time

Sorry to say it but without the prerequisite being taken care of you’re wasting my time. Or maybe I’ve been spoiled in the past? #shrugs

Overall, The Dream is sending the wrong message to inexperienced young men out there. It’s bad enough these rappers are just talking about fucking bitches, and now he’s tryna cut out foreplay. Whoa, whoa, whoa someone has to call these men out before they run amuck.  The only way this song is okay is if he’s talking about messing with a hoe which in that case I have no jurisdiction on the terms and conditions of their sexual encounter because I’ve never been about that life (honestly).

I’m talking a lot of shit on this post, but when things are still new between your new man (in my case) or new boo (in your case) you just gotta have it all. the. damn. time. anyway you can, and I get it! The adrenaline, emotions, thoughts, hormones are racing and you just want that person on a platter, but that doesn’t give The Dream the right to make an entire song about skipping foreplay. Get your life! Keep that shit to yourself. I want it all!

Points to take away from all of this is:
– Men, at least fulfill the prerequisite (and do it well).
– If you’re a regular dude you don’t get to skip foreplay unless that’s your main bish and y’all been at it for a minute.
– If you can afford to splurge on your woman feel free to skip foreplay in exchange for shopping sprees, trips, and access to your credit cards.
– Real men always make sure their woman’s needs are taken care of first!
– Neither party in the sexual experience should be lazy.

Feel free to leave your commentary below.
*Turns on some R. Kelly* tootles luvies
-TheJournalist25 xoxo

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